midnight
by Althesushiloveingfanficsage
Summary: Midnight drinks
1. the night is young, and so are we

Welcome to the bar!  
  
Disclaimer-I don't own love hina, now bring me a refill.  
  
Scene- kitsune, Al, Mutsumi, Haitani, and Shiri are sitting around a table at one of Kitsunes favorite bars.  
  
"Another please!"  
  
"Kitsune, that's your forth and we've only been here twenty minutes, slow down, I can't afford to stay at the speed your drinking!"  
  
"What can I say, I have a need."  
  
"Oh my yes.I am very much the same."  
  
"Well would you like another drink miss mutsumi? I'll gladly buy you one."  
  
"Oh thank you but I should be fine for the moment."  
  
"All right, cheese sticks are here!"  
  
"Ah cheese sticks; you know what these remind me off? Our own little kendo girl."  
  
"How's that?"  
  
"Well it's quite simple Al, these sticks, their all hard and uncomfortable on the outside, but if you break one open, it's so soft and warm, and you can suck it out."  
  
"Ahhh!" (Double nosebleeds)  
  
"Hey Al, how come you don't nosebleed like those two dorks?"  
  
"I think it's because I'm from America, and the blood doesn't rush to the head on our shoulders if we're virgins, like in Japan apparently.hey wait a minute, Sarah? What are you doing in here? This is a bar!"  
  
"Well technically your underage as well Al, and besides, you're supposed to be babysitting me for the evening."  
  
"Says who?"  
  
"Says the fact that I stole keitaro's wallet and I'm buying food for all of us."  
  
"Alright, the kid stays!"  
  
"Don't call me a kid fox girl."  
  
"So um mutsumi.time for a question I've been wondering for quite some time now, what are your feelings for keitaro?"  
  
"Oh me oh my, must you even ask?" (Blush)  
  
"Well it's just, you seem to love him, and yet you are so willing to give him up?"  
  
"Well.I just wish to see both naru-chan and kei Kun happy, and if their together they both will be."  
  
"Girl, you're taking the whole world on your shoulders, you really should worry about yourself once and a while."  
  
"Well I for one think that what you're doing for keitaro is truly noble, if you still regret giving him up I'd be glad to try and make you feel better, like say.on a dare, on Tuesday?"  
  
"Hey! Tuesday is the day that I need you to drive me to the airport, if I don't get on that flight and deliver the files, I'll loose my job!"  
  
"Sorry man, hoes before bros."  
  
"Did you just call turtle dork a hoe?"  
  
"Um err I uh.oh look, more drinks!"  
  
"Oh dear, I dropped my fork."  
  
"I'll get it!" (Two voices answer at the same time.)  
  
"Hey Alex, how many of those cheese sticks have you had? That looks like the fifth to me, and the rest of us are only on our thirds."  
  
"Very good kitsune, your not plastered enough to not remember how to count."  
  
"I'm just saying, it's not fair, that's all."  
  
"Well seeing as I bought it, I think my larger portion is justified doesn't you guys? Guys?"  
  
(Looks under table, finds two passed out boys. Promptly relives them of their wallets.)  
  
"What happened to them?"  
  
"I think it's the skirt mutsumi is wearing, they are bleeding out the nose."  
  
"Baka hentai."  
  
"You're a mean person you know that Sarah?"  
  
"The worlds a mean place, I just adjust."  
  
"Oh yeah? What's so tough about your life eh?"  
  
"Well let's see.hmmm.oh yeah.maybe, MY PAPA LEFT ME WITH YOU WEIRDOS FOR ONE!"  
  
"Sarah, have you been drinking?"  
  
"Only a sip, but (sniff) why would papa leave me with you?"  
  
"now kid, we've been through this, your papa loves you and he loves you enough to know that if you traveled everywhere with him, you'd never grow up to be successful young women. You need somewhere to grow, go to school and such."  
  
"But why with you freaks?" (Sobbing)  
  
"because he trust us freaks, he knows that should you ever have a problem, we can help you, we've all helped each other, and when it looks like your about to go under, hold on to us, we'll keep you afloat."  
  
"Oh my, kitsune, that was so sweet." (Blows nose on hanky)  
  
"Yeah Kitsune, I've never seen you act like a loving caring individual, whatcha drinking over there?"  
  
"Very funny neko boy, but believe it or not, I am very loving and caring, before keitaro came I was like an older sister to the girls, they had a problem, I helped them with it, I'm very good at this stuff, good training my sisters gave me."  
  
"Whoa, you have sisters?"  
  
"Oops, forget I said that."  
  
"oh no you don't, almost every member of our little family has a story, except you, all we know about you is that you and naru were best friends in high school, now I want to hear your story."  
  
"I don't think so pal, my story is mine alone, and I don't want to go about spouten it off and giving you any openings to get to my soft side."  
  
"Uh.ok?"  
  
"Good, now back to my comforting Sarah.oh, never mind."  
  
"Zzzzzzz"  
  
"Wow, I guess it is getten late." (Gets up)  
  
"Whoa hey, hold your horses pal, where you off to, it's Saturday night, no reason for you to leave."  
  
"But what about Sarah?"  
  
"Aw I've slept in this bar plenty of times, it's not a bad place to wake up either, dim, smells nice once pops has those eggs cooking."  
  
"You don't worry too much when you drink do you?"  
  
"No not really."  
  
"Whatever, pass me that bottle of Dew, I need to get tanked, this is gonna be a long night."  
  
"Oh my, I think I passed out again."  
  
"Well good to know your alive mutsumi, I thought you were sleeping."  
  
"Uh.white cotton?"  
  
"With l..Little flower patterns?"  
  
"Good to know your awake too boys, I was about to take a pulse."  
  
"You know how to take a pulse."  
  
"Oh there's a lot about me you don't know."  
  
"I suppose I might learn something tonight then."  
  
"Oh my, I think we all might."  
  
A/n hi.thanks for reading another story, I know I still have two I need to finish but I was inspired. Please R&R and I swear I'll have the next chapter up soon. 


	2. and so the night drags on

Welcome to the bar!  
  
Disclaimer-I don't own love hina, now bring me a refill.  
  
A/N- hiyas, thanks to all my reviewers, no matter what story you reviewed, I love ya all  
  
Scene- kitsune, Al, Mutsumi, Haitani, Shiri, and Sarah are sitting around a table at one of Kitsunes favorite bars.  
  
"All right! Pass that chicken teriyaki this way my good waiter."  
  
"Vegetable tempura over here."  
  
"Vegetables? Your nuts man, ah yes, those are my green soy beans, thank you."  
  
"Soy beans? Yuk, I'd rather some of this lo main."  
  
"Ye gods man, you aren't going to eat that entire are you?"  
  
"I have to; we blew all of our cash on the last round of drinks so if I can eat all of this, then our meals free."  
  
"You dork, that's like, five pounds of lo main and nine pounds of Californian rolls, you'll never eat all of that alone."  
  
"Is that a volunteer I hear?"  
  
"Sure, why not, I love Californian rolls."  
  
"Mmmm!"  
  
"Mutsumi, don't try to eat the whole water melon in one bite!"  
  
(Gulp) "Sorry Miss Kitsune, it just reminds me of home."  
  
"Is that why you always have some watermelons handy?"  
  
"Oh me oh my, yes, I get so homesick, I usually have so many brothers and sisters, being the oldest I've known them all their lives and I get so lonely if I'm not with someone that I can take care of."  
  
"Ya know, that almost sounds like Su turtle lady."  
  
"Oh my, she has the urge to care for things, that's so wonderful, I must go see her."  
  
"No, no! What Sarah means is that Su feels the urge to latch on to people too."  
  
"oh, well I can understand why, so far away from home, I'm surprised Sarah doesn't get homesick, don't you miss California?"  
  
"Well to tell ya the truth, yes. Japan is nice, but the people here are just so weird compared to the ones back home, no offense."  
  
"None taken, I think that Californians would sound weird to us if we met them."  
  
"Not me, I was born there."  
  
"Well I mean the rest of us you Baka Neko."  
  
"Ya know no one is really sure weather these are cat ears or dog ears yet."  
  
"Well I like cats better, (rubs furry ears) and their so soft and fuzzy, I just love to rub them."  
  
"Oh my, let me rub one too, it looks like so much fun!"  
  
(Blushing) "K.knock it off you guys, that.that.that actually feels kinda good." (Sigh of contentment.)  
  
"Ya know that's the same look one would get while being massaged by a pretty lady?"  
  
"Lucky bastered."  
  
"Sorry boys, if you come back with some furry cat ears, then we'll talk."  
  
"Aw."  
  
"See! That's what I'm talking about; you guys are getting turned on by rubbing some kitty ears."  
  
"Um.no we're not."  
  
"I don't know what you mean, Al chan just seems to enjoy it so."  
  
"Ahhh.my whole body feels like jelly." (Drool)  
  
"Eww, that's so icky!"  
  
"Aw, little musumi not like the drool?"  
  
"And you do fox girl?"  
  
"Um.come to think about it.no." (Stops ear rubbing)  
  
"Ugh.well that's good I guess, I can't just lay here, I need to eat this food."  
  
"Take your time rush, we got all night."  
  
"Um.sure, you guys don't have work tomorrow right?"  
  
"Work, on the weekends?"  
  
"Come on Al, even we're not THAT poor."  
  
"Yes, we'll be here all night, so let's order some more watermelons!"  
  
"Is it safe to eat so many of them?"  
  
"Hasn't hurt me yet."  
  
"Um.ok, hey boys I got a question, are you two secretly gay?"  
  
"NO!!!!"  
  
"Well I was just wondering, ya know you two are always together so it raises questions."  
  
"We learned long ago that it's always a good idea to have someone to watch your back for ya."  
  
"Yeah, alone we get in all kinds of trouble, we're almost as bad as keitaro, but if there's two of us, then at least one of us can clean up the mess the other leaves behind."  
  
"Yeah, what I don't get is how no one ever remembers our names at your house."  
  
"Well gee, could it be because you disappear for months on end and only return for a little while?"  
  
"Well we've moved closer to the hinata house apartment wise, so don't worry, we'll be around."  
  
"Um actually."  
  
(All eyes turn to shiri)  
  
"Well.I uh, kind of flirted with our new landlords daughter, and she hates me, I'm pretty sure that we'll be on the street in a week."  
  
"WHAT!?!"  
  
"N...now now, calm down haitani, I'm sure we can find you a new apartment!"  
  
"No.I'm.I'm..."  
  
"The dorks gonna blow!"  
  
"I'M SO PROUD OF YOU!" (Hug shiri till his face turns blue)  
  
"Wha?"  
  
"This little loser has never ever tried to actively flirt with a girl unless I'm around, and he went out and tried to bag one all by himself, (tearing up) I'm so proud of him!"  
  
"Um.good job?"  
  
"Oh I see, so you're proud because franken nerd was brave and hit on someone."  
  
"But he got shot down."  
  
(The boys glare at Alex)  
  
"IT'S NOT THE OUTCOME, IT'S THE FACT THAT HE TRIED!!!!"  
  
"EEHH! I think I'll just hide behind my stack of sushi here."  
  
(Light bulb appears above mutsumi's head)  
  
"Oh my, I have a good idea."  
  
"Yes?"  
  
(Lightblub flickers and goes out)  
  
"Um.I think I lost it."  
  
(Everyone except Alex and mutsumi face faults)  
  
"Slippery little devils, I'm surprised you guys didn't expect her to forget."  
  
"Yeah well, ya never know, she could be hiding her genius."  
  
(Everyone laughs at this as the little light bulb goes on over mutsumi's head again)  
  
"OH! Maybe the boy's could live in the apartment next to mine, there's no one else living there."  
  
"That IS a good idea mutsumi, I'm proud of you."  
  
"Oh my, thank you Kitsune."  
  
"Yeah, I didn't think a ditz could have a great idea like that."  
  
"Well we ditzes do tend to have a good idea every now and then."  
  
"Oh Al, I don't think you're a ditz."  
  
"Thanks mutsumi, but you also don't think that you'll ever be happy if naru AND keitaro are happy, and let's face it, it's a rare occasion that they both are happy at the same time."  
  
"Hmm.now all I need to do is find a way to get all of our stuff out of the apartment without the landlord killing us."  
  
"Hmm.Al, if I may play devils advocate for a moment?"  
  
"Um.sure Sarah, go ahead."  
  
(Sarah goes off to play "devils advocate," the pinball game, and returns smiling)  
  
"Ok, I have an idea, but it'll cost ya."  
  
"How much?"  
  
"You know that trigun poster you have, the one with wolfwood on it?"  
  
"Um.which one?"  
  
"Yeah, we have tons."  
  
"The one where he has his portable confessional and his cross and he looks all cool like this." (Sarah poses)  
  
"Oh yeah, you want that?"  
  
"Yeah, wolfwoods a hottie."  
  
"Ya know, coming from most eight year olds, that would be creepy, but for some reason I am not surprised hearing it from you."  
  
"I don't see why you're surprised, wolfwood is a hottie."  
  
"Oh my yes, I agree, he's dead sexy, but vash is right up there."  
  
"Ok, coming from mutsumi that seems weird for some reason."  
  
(Everyone sweat drops as haitani and shiri are dressed as wolfwood and vash.)  
  
"Um.what are you guys doing?"  
  
"You two said their hotties right? Well." (The boys pose heroically)  
  
"Um. I really don't think that does gonna work for you two."  
  
"No way, wolfwoods way hotter then you dorks."  
  
"Oh my yes, and vash is nowhere near as short and chubby as you are Mr..oh.um.what's your name again."  
  
"WAHH! She can't even remember my name when she heard it not ten minutes ago!"  
  
"I repeat, does it really surprise you?"  
  
"I don't see why it shouldn't, they seem so surprised that we can barely remember their names, and we hardly see or talk to them."  
  
"Yep, fox girls got a point, hey, Al? Why are you dressed like lupin the III? None of us think he's a hottie."  
  
"Hmm? Can't a guy dress like an anime character with sideburns to spare and not face an inquisition?"  
  
"You are getting too weird, I think these dorks are rubbing off on you rush."  
  
"Why do you always call us dorks, we know you like hanging with us."  
  
"Yeah but I worry that I might end up like you weirdo's."  
  
"Um.honey? You already are weird, you're an eight year old who curses, hits people with artifacts, and seems to act more mature then most the people in our home, that's weird."  
  
"AHHH! Your right! I am weird!!!!" (Tears well up in eyes)  
  
"B...but sarah, didn't you act like that before you came here?"  
  
"(Sniff) yeah."  
  
"So ya see, you're the same as you were before you came here, your not too weird."  
  
(Al shoots a dirty look at kitsune.)  
  
"You.you really don't think I'm weird."  
  
"Of corse not."  
  
"Yeah, none of us really think your weird Sarah."  
  
"Oh my no, but they also didn't think Al's cat ears were weird after a few days."  
  
"WHAAAAA!"  
  
(Two voices) "MUTSUMI!!!"  
  
"Oh my, did I say something wrong?" 


	3. from bad to worse

Disclaimer- I do not own love hina, I do however own myself, dizzy, buddy and scary cat thing, but you'll find out about her later.  
  
Chibi kitsune- Ahem, on be half of the management of the fic, I am asked to read to you the fallowing, Ahem…  
  
Dear readers,  
  
First off, let me thank you for reading yet another fic of mine and I would request that you all R&R when you finish, I greatly respect your advice and opinions. Any suggestions or ideas will be greatly appreciated and I'll even take flames, just as long as I get some feedback,   
  
(Kitsune stops reading) Gah, Al your such a review whore, but just to let you all know, whoever flames gets to deal with me, and I may only be as big as your thumb, but I'm mean, allow me to continue.  
  
Now if you haven't gone over my other fic about evil hidden wars, I'd like to tell you about a movement on adult swim's message boards.  
  
There is currently a large thread (over 2687 posts long and growing) and we on it are dedicated to a nobel cause, to get Adult swim to put love hina on their programming block. We are strong, but we greatly need all the support we can get, so I ask you, my fellow fanfic authors, readers, and fans of anime, please join the adult swim message boards and post on our thread, we will achive our goal, adult swim knows we're there, and we are one of the longest threads on there, so please, show the love for love hina.  
  
This desperate plee was brought to you by Althesushiloveingfanficsage  
  
viva love hina!  
  
Chibi Kitsune- well that was a pathtic attempt at gaining supporters al, oh well, please go and find the boards, any who asks in a review will get a direct link, and hey, maybe we'll reward those of you we see on the boards, ah well, on with the fic!  
  
p.s, we are in no way afilliated with adultswim we're just on their messageboards, not an advertisement to get folks to join adultswim, we sware!  
  
A Smokey fog floated over hinata, most of the inhabitants all asleep, lights out over most of the town, except for one particular bar.  
  
In this seedy old bar, many drunks and bums littered the actual bar, and many sat playing cards or pool, but one such group stood out in this motley crew, the sat in a booth, a huge pile of food in front of them, and at the moment, one of them was slowly killing one of the others.  
  
"GIVE ME THAT PLUM!!!!" (Kitsune throttles Al)  
  
"AHHHHHGH!" (Al releases plum)  
  
(Sarah leans over to whisper in Alex's ear)   
  
"Did things just get more descriptive Mr. Fanfic author?"  
  
"Eh heh heh, I hadn't noticed" (sweat drops as kitsune pops the plum into her mouth.)  
  
yes, so the gang is just chatting, mutsumi passes out and to take a break from his monstrous meal, Al challenges shiri to a game of devils advocate, the pinball game, leaving sarah (eating) and haitani and kitsune chatting.  
  
"So, ya think I have a chance with her?" (Looks at mutsumi and blushes red)  
  
"Hmm…I think really anyone could have a chance with her, if the members of the hinata house don't try to kill you for being perverted."  
  
"For trying to date her?"  
  
"Hon, dating her is all you'll do, any time you try to get close or intimate, something bad will happen or naru and motoko will find you and beat the living crap out of you, keitaro and Al are living proof of this, plus, mutsumi can't keep a secret for long and soon all of them will know."  
  
"Too bad, (jokingly) well I guess I can always date you."  
  
"Not a chance pal, your poor collage otaku life style isn't my bag."  
  
"Yeah, I figured I'd have no chance with you either."  
  
(Gets anime depressed complete with black depression aura and spirals)  
  
"aw relax pal, you'll find another girl, from what kei's told me you we're quiet the ladies man in high school, didn't I hear you got 30 chocolates one valentines day?"  
  
"Fake, I bought those chocolates pretending it was for my sister."  
  
"Oh, and the cake you got that one time that you were bragging about?"  
  
"I made it, and it tasted awful."  
  
Kitsune face faulted   
  
"GOD WHAT IS IT WITH THESE LOSERS AND FAKEING VALENTINES DAY!?!" she wondered.  
  
"What do you think, what do real girls look for in a guy."  
  
"Um…elaborate, what's a "real girl?"  
  
"Um…well…you know…not…so…so…" (Stammering from embarrassment)  
  
"So what?"  
  
"So mannish."  
  
"What? Oh you mean like me, hey wait WHAT!?!"  
  
"Well konno-chan, it's not that your mannish your just…err"  
  
"Sexy, full bodied fun?"  
  
"Needy."  
  
(Laughs) "yeah I guess that's true, though I only really play along, I know that when I find my true love, he wont have to be rich to keep me by his side, just someone fun loving, manly, and reliable, kind of like…(mumbles)"  
  
"Eh?" (Leans over with Sarah to hear what she said.)  
  
"HEY!" (Blushes)  
  
"Go on, who'd you say?"  
  
"I bet I know." (Sarah does her trademark devils grin)  
  
"Oh do you now?" (Kitsune looks angry)  
  
"Sure, my papa!"  
  
"KYAHHH! Who told you?!?!"  
  
"No one, you blush every time he comes over, and don't think I don't notice what toy's you leave lying out every morning after he leaves."  
  
"AHHH…t…toys?" (Haitani nosebleed)  
  
"You little sneak! How do you know what toys I leave out?"  
  
"Your TV's got a recorder so I can record all the animes that are on after bedtime, and when I come in to get them in the morning…well lets just say I've had to explain quite a few things to Su when she fallows me in."  
  
"WHY YOU LITTLE!!!" (Lunges at Sarah)  
  
"AHHH HELP!"   
  
(Runs and jumps behind pool table as poor haitani, bombarded by these images passes out and slides under the table.)  
  
"WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU YOUR BUTTS GONNA BE SOOO SORE!"  
  
"AHH, YOU LEAVE MY BUTT ALONE YOU CRAZY LESBIAN RAPEST!"  
  
(At this the entire bar goes silent and stares at Kitsune who blushes and slinks back to her seat.)  
  
"Heh heh, kids and their crazy stories."  
  
(Alex returns to the table, after creaming shiri)  
  
"How do you do that, half the instructions are in Japanese!"  
  
"Well my reading may not be too great, but if there's anything I understand, its video games…hey, what happened to haitani?"  
  
"Err…nothing, nothing at all."  
  
"Right…ok then so where we're we?"   
  
(Shiri pushes his limp friend back into a sitting position.)  
  
"Um…I'm not sure, what's to talk about, um…oh I know, why is naru so indecisive over keitaro?"  
  
"Oh that's an easy one."  
  
"Well?"  
  
"well I've been naru's friend all my life, and I figure it's because she's always been so spacey, always dreaming about a knight in shining armor and all that, and now that she's older and um…physically mature, she realizes that in a adult relationship that dirty things might happen, I basically think she's afraid."  
  
"Afraid?" (Shiri looks confused)  
  
"Well that does sound about right, I've only known you guys for about a month but it fits her well enough."  
  
"Yeah, she worries that her true love won't fit that perfect mold she had, and that if she takes a chance with someone, that she might lose the relationship she had with them in the first place."  
  
"Oh I get it, your saying that she likes keitaro, but she doesn't want to go too fast because if she does it might ruin the friendship she has with him now."  
  
"Indubitively!"  
  
"Wha?"  
  
"That means your right."  
  
"Oh, so all we need to do is get her to realize that kei isn't gonna force her to do anything she doesn't wanna do and they'll be happily ever after."   
  
(Smiles as if to be proud of his plan)  
  
"Sweet, meddling is my favorite sport." (Grins a foxy grin)  
  
"Yeah, I'm in too, and so is haitani when he wakes up."  
  
"You really are stupid aren't you?"   
  
(All eyes' turn to Sarah)  
  
"Don't you all realize that you're meddling often times only makes things worse?"  
  
"Um…" (Kitsune thinks) "Nope."  
  
(Face fault by everyone else)  
  
"Sarah has a point kitsune, your meddling ways usually make things worse, and why do you feel the urge to meddle eh?"  
  
"Well until I find my true love, I'm gonna help others find there own true loves, someone in the hinata house has to get some action."  
  
"Do you just like playing matchmaker?"  
  
"Well…."   
  
(The fallowing is a vision of what kitsune hears when the others are eating breakfast.)  
  
Naru, shinobu, mutsumi and motoko- matchmaker matchmaker make me a match,  
  
Find me a find, catch me a catch,  
  
Bring me a man, who can make me,   
  
The envy of all I see.  
  
(Kitsune taking notes)  
  
Naru and shinobu- for motoko make him a scholar,  
  
For mutsumi make him rich as a king,  
  
For me well I wouldn't holler,  
  
If he were as handsome as anything!  
  
Motoko and mutsumi- matchmaker matchmaker I'll bring the veil,  
  
You bring the groom, slender and pale,  
  
Night after night a great partner he'll be,  
  
In bed pleasing me.  
  
(Fantasy ends)  
  
"Um that's funny but I don't remember it quite like that."  
  
"Yeah, nether do I Al."  
  
"I think this is what happened."  
  
(Alex and Sarah's version)  
  
Keitaro- I'm sorry naru, I didn't mean to really!  
  
Alex- what happened now?  
  
Naru- That perverted imp felt me up again!  
  
Alex- oh so that's what that crash was earlier.  
  
Motoko- burp! (Blushes bright red) I'm so sorry! (Runs away.)  
  
Su- (singing) everyday I hear that song I hop outta bed,  
  
That rice crispy cereal is singing in my head!  
  
(Al and Sarah sing along)- Song so irresistible I wanna hear it all,  
  
Just a splash of ice cold milk and it begins to call!  
  
Everyone- snap crackle pop!  
  
Su Al and sarah- that's who we are!  
  
Everyone- Snap crackle pop!  
  
Su Al and Sarah- but the sounds the star!  
  
(Flashback ends)  
  
"Wow, did you guys really sing that whole thing?"   
  
"Yeah, it would feel stupid around other folks but these dorks make it fun."  
  
"Well it is a good song."  
  
"Are you sure we didn't sing matchmaker?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Wow…oh well, just because they didn't ask doesn't mean I can't try and help."  
  
"Have you learned nothing!?!"  
  
"Nope I guess not." (Grin and wink)  
  
(Everyone sighs except Al who just laughs.)  
  
"That's why I like to hang with you kitsune, your immoral and proud of it."  
  
"Damn straight."  
  
"So sarah, dare I ask what your little plan involving us getting out of our apartment is?" (Haitani wakes up as shiri questions.)  
  
"Gimmi a minute, I gotta think one up."  
  
"You mean you don't have one yet?!?" (Two frightened faces look to her)  
  
"Look, I'll think of something I always do, now gimmi a break."  
  
(Haitani is about to respond to Sarah but something stops him.)  
  
The gang looks confused then fallows his gaze and see he is looking at a woman at the bar who's looking at him.  
  
At this point everyone except haitani and shiri who are drooling at the girl hear music playing in the background from the radio behind the bar.  
  
Rodney Carrington's I think I'm dancen with a man,  
  
I saw her sitt'en in a barroom,  
  
In that smoky atmosphere,  
  
She smiled back at me, as I drank down one last beer.  
  
(Haitani swigs down his beer as the girl walks over and takes his arm)  
  
She pulled me on the dance floor,  
  
We danced a song or two,  
  
It was then I realized that I,  
  
Had bit off more then I could chew,  
  
(Haitani looks nervous now and not scared-around-girls-nervous)  
  
I think I'm dance'n with a man!  
  
She's got calluses on her hands,  
  
She's got a voice like Johnny cash,  
  
Is she hiding a mustache?  
  
I think I'm dance'n with a man.  
  
(they go sit at the bar while the gang at the table is cracking up at the mess haitani's gotten himself into, except…oddly enough, shiri.)  
  
We sat down and talked awhile,  
  
And we listened to the band,  
  
(Shiri gets up and walks over to them)  
  
And a friend of mine walked by,  
  
And he asked her if she'd dance,  
  
Then he gently took her hand,  
  
And he twirled her round and round,  
  
It looked like he was have'n fun,  
  
Until her skirt fell to the ground.  
  
(The gang at the table looks like their dieing their laughing so hard)  
  
I think he's dance'n with a man!  
  
The boys at the lodge won't understand,  
  
As they two steeped cross the floor,  
  
I quickly headed for the door,  
  
I think he's dance'n with a man  
  
GOOD LORD WE'RE DANCE'N WITH A MAN!  
  
It'll be known throughout the land!  
  
Two boys from hinata dance a jig,  
  
With a dude who wore a wig,  
  
We been dance'n with a man.  
  
(Shiri try's to exit with haitani but this angers the girl/guy)  
  
Haitani- she just crushed a beer can on her head…  
  
Shiri- good lord her forehead's red!  
  
Haitani- we been dance'n with a damn big maaaaaaaaan.  
  
(The music stops and the boys grab Sarah and run)  
  
"Gottagogetourstufffromourapartmentseeya!"  
  
Kitsune wiped away a tear of mirth as the man/not man chased after them growling.  
  
"Should we help them?" Al looks nervous and humored by the happenings.  
  
"Oh I think they'll be ok, bertha never really hurts anyone too bad, as long as the don't touch her car…"  
  
A roar of rage shakes the building fallowed by screams and a car burning rubber as it peels out of the bar's parking lot  
  
"We parked right next to her car didn't we?" Alex asked in a flat voice.  
  
"Yep, those guys better be quick or they'll be in intensive care for awhile."  
  
"Barkeep?" mutsumi raised her hand and the waiter came over.  
  
"I'd like the most expensive booze you have please."  
  
As the waiter walks away kitsune and Al look horrified.  
  
"Mutsumi! Just because I might be able to finish this mountain of lo main and Californian rolls and win us a free meal doesn't mean to go nuts!" Alex glared at the turtle lady.  
  
"Oh my, it's alright Al-Chan, haitani and shiri left their wallets."  
  
Kitsune and Alex exchanged a look and grinned.  
  
"Waiter, make that four of your strongest, and the most caffinated soda you have!"  
  
(Outside on the highway)  
  
Sarah- um haitani, are you sure you should be driving, you have had a lot to drink after all.  
  
Haitani- I'm fine (hiccup) it's the damn road thatshh moving.  
  
Shiri-zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz  
  
Sarah- Haitani! There's a police car right behind us, he wants you to pull over!  
  
Haitani- you sure?  
  
Sarah- yeah!  
  
Haitani- How sure?  
  
Sarah- pretty sure!  
  
Haitani- Really pretty sure or just kinda pretty sure?  
  
Sarah- PULL OVER NOW YOU IDIOT BEFORE HE THINKS YOUR TRYING TO RUN FOR IT!!!!  
  
Haitani- oh all right.  
  
(Car veers off to the side of the road and the cop gets out and walks up to the window)  
  
Haitani- lo osifer.  
  
Police person jimbo- sir is you drunk?  
  
Haitani- hell yeah, (laughing) thank god you showed up, I coulda killed somebody.  
  
Sarah- (sweatdrop) you know you're drunk when you're pulled over and you're laughing.  
  
PPJ- (shines flashlight on Sarah) who are you?  
  
Sarah- hi, I'm the daughter of their friend and they were giving me a ride to their apartment so I could get something I left there but I guess no one realized how smashed they were.  
  
PPJ- hmm, ok, sir (back to haitani) could you step out of the car?  
  
Haitani- I can't you get in. (tries to pull the cop in through the window.)  
  
Sarah- Haitani no!  
  
(Back at the bar twenty minutes later)  
  
"Exactly how far away from the bar do haitani and Shiri live?" Alex looks over to Kitsune with a nervous look.  
  
"Not too far, why, you worried?"  
  
"A little, I mean, if you think about it, Haitani has been drinking quite a lot tonight, and now he's driving?"  
  
"Oh my, I see what you mean Al-Chan; we might need to go look for them."  
  
"Hmm, lets give'm another twenty, and then Al can go look for them on the vespa and mutsumi and I can wait here for you."  
  
"Ok, so umm…what do ya wanna talk about?" Alex asked as he sipped his sparkling lime sherbert soda.  
  
"Oh pick me pick me!" Mutsumi had raised her hand.  
  
"Ok, Mutsumi, what would you like to talk about?" Kitsune asked.  
  
"How about what's going on with Al-Chan and shinobu?"   
  
Al coughs and sputters on his soda.  
  
"Ooooo, that's a good one, ok fess up Alex, what's you relationship with shinobu?"  
  
"Um err I, I just like her as a friend for now and I uh…" (He laughs nervously and blushes beet red)  
  
"Oh yeah, "just friends?" would her diary say otherwise?" Kitsune grins her foxy grin.  
  
"Um yeah sure…why not, eh heh!"  
  
"Oh my, well why don't we look then?" Mutsumi smiled that spacey smile of hers.  
  
"Well we don't have it…right?" Alex looked up, worried.  
  
The girls snickered and giggled.  
  
"Right?" Alex looks terrified and his voice rises a few desables.  
  
Kitsune holds up a diary entitled "Shinobu's picture diary."  
  
"Eep!" Alex eeped at realizing that he was soon to get in so much trouble.  
  
"Let's see now, what day was it that you saved her again?"  
  
"Really, I would do it for anyone, I think the only reason I lived when they shot me up, is Su's booth did something, that's all…I."  
  
"Quit trying to avoid the question Al-Chan."  
  
"Ahah! Found it…eh?"  
  
Kitsune reached into her pocket and withdrew her cell phone, vibrating madly…the phone, not kitsune.  
  
"Hello, WHAT!" Kitsune's shocked voice echoed throughout the bar.  
  
________________________________________________________________________  
  
(At the station)  
  
Sarah- yeah, you heard me, we're in the slammer, Haitani tried to molest a police officer and now we need you to come bail us out!  
  
Kitsune- Alright, just sit tight, um… how much is bail?  
  
Sarah- The officer was pretty ticked; it's set at 60,000 yen for the lot of us, though you can get me out for only 10,000.  
  
Kitsune- Why do we even need to pay to get you out, you're a minor!  
  
Sarah- well the chief recognized my voice from last month when Su and I Toilet papered his house on Halloween.  
  
Kitsune- We doesn't have that kind of money!  
  
Sarah- I know, I'm sorry but there's nothing I can do, hurry up, it's karaoke night in the cafeteria and the singing isn't as bad as the child molesters that keep staring at me from acrossed the room, I'm scared, the guards aren't interested in keeping us safe once we're here. Please get over here, the singing is terrible!  
  
Kitsune- (serious for a change) ok Sarah, calm down, we'll be there soon, I'll get you out.  
  
Sarah- Please hurry.  
  
Kitsune- I will, bye. (Kitsune hangs up and explains the situation to Mutsumi and Alex)  
  
"We gotta hurry, Sarah was trying to hide it but she's scared, I could hear it in her voice, we need to go."  
  
"Alright, but we need money, and fast, now we've spent all of ours, where can we get more?"  
  
"Um…I have another idea." Mutsumi raises her hand again.  
  
"Three ideas in one night, you're on a roll babe." Kitsune winks but it lacks the cheerful look it usually does.  
  
"Kitsune, how many of the people in this bar are your friends?"  
  
"Hmm…a good portion of the guys will buy me a drink, but no way can we get 60,000 yen from them."  
  
"Oh that wasn't my plan, I just wanted to know, and many of them are staring at your chest."  
  
"ERRG!" Kitsune glares at the men, scareing them uh… witless, and glares at Mutsumi.  
  
"WHAT IS YOUR PLAN!?!"  
  
"Ahh, feeling faint."  
  
"No, no Mutsumi, don't pass out, she's sorry, just tell us the plan!"  
  
"Ok, whisper whisper whisper" (Mutsumi whisper in the ears of Kitsune and Al for a moment.  
  
"That's so crazy it just might work." Alex said with a grin.  
  
Kitsune nodded, "Ok, I know for a fact that if anyplace in this bar has up to 60,000 yen, it'll be there, so how do we create a distraction?"  
  
"Ara ara, Leave that to me, just get ready."  
  
After a short conversation with the bartender, Mutsumi gets up on the stage, usually reserved for Karaoke, and smiles at the crowd.  
  
"Excuse me, I'd like to sing you a short little ditty, because I need some money to buy more drinks, so please enjoy."  
  
Dixie chicks, long time gone.  
  
Mutsumi- (produces a guitar from somewhere and begins to play it.  
  
Daddy sit's on the front porch swinging, looken out a vacant field,  
  
Used to be filled with burly tobbaca now he knows it never will,  
  
My brother found work in Indiana, my sister is worken at the old folks home,  
  
Momma's still cooking too much for supper and me I been a long time gone,  
  
long time gone!  
  
No I ain't held a hoe since I don't know when  
  
Long time gone   
  
and it ain't coming back again.  
  
(While Mutsumi continues to sing at an audience that is more interested in her curves then her crooning, Al and Kitsune successfully jimmy open the "Devil's Advocate" pinball machine and discover that the barkeep really never did empty out the contents)  
  
(On the road)  
  
"Hurry Alex, we're taking too long getting there."  
  
"You really are worried aren't you; I've never seen you so nervous for another person's well being before."  
  
"I told you, I can be sensitive and serious when I need to, and I'm scared, those prisons are full of murderers and rapist who haven't seen a woman in years, what if we get there and it's too late for them?" Kitsune is now flat out terrified of what she may find.  
  
"Calm down, Sarah can take care of herself, she's proven that she's strong enough to hold her ground, and the boy's will stick with her." I hope, Al added silently.  
  
"Ok, but hurry!" Kitsune held his midsection tighter as the vespa gained speed and became too loud to here from either of them.  
  
a/n- ooo, tense, now for those of you thinking I wouldn't do something like that to sarah or haitani or shiri, I will. I've been writing fanfics for awhile, and when I helped my friend who was obsessed with back street boys at the time, write fanfic's for them, we did horrible things to them, and we liked them in these fics, if it'll be a good angst fic later I'll do it, don't tempt me!  
  
Sarah, haitani and Shiri- Gulp!  
  
Sarah- y…your just blowing steam right?  
  
Alex- nope, just ask howie formally from the back street boys, we mangled his little taco bell dog and hung him from a swinging ceiling fan once.  
  
Sarah- eew, don't do it, you'll have to upgrade the fic to an R fic.  
  
Alex- so?  
  
Haitani and shiri cover their butts and look really pale and frightened.  
  
Chibi kitsune- you really won't, i know you.  
  
Al- oh ho! a challenge?  
  
chibi kitsune, yeah, i dare ya!  
  
Haitani, shiri, and sarah- SHUT UP YOU! 


	4. well now arn't we in trouble

claimer of dis-  
  
Chibi desktop kitsune- Al dosen't own love hina.  
  
on opposite day that would mean i would say he does.  
  
unless it's opposite day and someone told me it was opposite day in which case i would think they were telling the opposite and that it wasn't and that it was a nomral day where i would say, "Al dosen't own love hina."  
  
Al-sigh, can't you do anything easily?  
  
CK- nope.  
  
Haitani, shiri and sarah were sitting at a hard metal table in the dineing hall/game room of bob's medium security prison, one of the few where the females and the males were allowed interaction, mainly because the few girls who got in there could fend for themselves.  
  
They watched as a tall bald guy with studs all over his face and a green mohawk got onto stage and introduced himself as Nigal.  
  
"good evening, 'ow are all ya jailbirdies tonight?"  
  
The prisoners responded in a creepy unison, "very well Nigal, thank you."  
  
"Right den, time for the second half of our Karoke night, and i say we here a little number from our new comers."  
  
He smiles at Haitani, Shiri and Sarah, they shudder from the creepy grin.  
  
"n..no really, we couldn't we're very shy." Haitani muttered.  
  
"y...yeah, shy." shiri squeeked in a voice that said he had noticed how angry everyone looked.  
  
"no no me duckies, you don't git it, you've gotta sing, whoever get's the lowest rank from our scoreing machine here becomes the...um...let's say special friend for the week, and that means your everyone's special friend, starting with our winner from last week, big fat baby eating bubba jones." Nigal pointed at a very attractive female who haitani would have purposely lost to meet.  
  
"Yo." Bubba responded in a voice that was so low it would shake the walls when it sang.  
  
"ehhh." the three looked very nervous as the prisoners chuckled.  
  
"huddle!" Sarah barked as she and the boy's went into a football huddle.  
  
"Ok first off i'd like to remind you, that THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" Sarah screamed at haitani as she slapped him inbetween each word.  
  
"Ow, ow, hey, stop that!" he rubbed his sore face.  
  
"shiri man, got any plans?" he asked as the smaller boy grined sheepishly.  
  
"well uh...no."  
  
"what do you mean? your the smart one!" haitani demanded.  
  
"sorry guys," shiri sweatdropped. "but i don't have any idea what to do, best we can is sing and hope kitsune and Al get here before anything happens."  
  
"That's not a plan! that's a hope!" sarah moaned as she peaked out of the huddle at the large scary men who had been eyeing her throughout the night, she had a really bad feeling about this.  
  
"Alright, we'll go rock paper scissors to see who goes first, odd man or girl out goes first." Haitani said as the others nodded.  
  
One...two...three..shoot!  
  
meanwhile somewhere outside of hinata hot springs...  
  
Kitsune Kicked Al's vespa for about the sixth time in under a minute.   
  
"You lousy hunk of junk!" she continued to kick the vehical until her toe hurt at which point she started to search for a stich to beat it with.  
  
Al's corpse twitched back to life after watching his life flash before his eyes.  
  
I never should have written Don't stop the carnival, that is just a bad fic, i should finish it and try to make it better." he muttered as he lay flat on his back, stareing up at the stars.  
  
Cue flashback   
  
(chibi Kitsune turns on cheesy flashback effects)  
  
Al sped down the highway on the vespa, Kitsune clinging to his back, the saddlebag of the vespa filled with the bale money that haitani, shiri and sarah needed, in quarters.  
  
"these heavy bags are makeing it hard to turn so lean with me ok Kitsune?" Al yelled over the noise of the engine and the busy highway.  
  
Kitsune yelled back in agreement and all would have been fine, if not for one dozy trucker.  
  
Kitsune saw him first, asleep at the wheel, the driver of the monsterous 18 wheeler in the next lane, slowly swerveing twords them.  
  
"ALEX!" she screamed, but the noise of the cars around them and the vespa's engine drown her out.  
  
she screamed his name again and again but he couldn't hear her, so she tapped him on the arm and he yelled back what she supposed was "yeah?"  
  
she pointed as the truck was practaclly ontop of them, Alex yelled, Kitsune screamed and the vespa took a sharp right and barely missed becomeing a fords hood ornament.  
  
Al struggled to regain control as the vespa swerved wildly over the pavement, the heavy bag's of change must be throwning us off balance! his panic filled mind yelled.  
  
the last thing either of them remember is hitting a ditch off the side of the road, then black.  
  
(back to normal time)  
  
Alex lay still, letting the powers of the roach that seemed to stop himself and keitaro from ever dieing took over, healing the broken bones, though not numbing the pain.  
  
Kitsune walked over to his limp form.  
  
"are you alive yet?" she asked pokeing him with a stick.  
  
"almost, why?"  
  
"well uh, the bag's of change got launched from the bike."  
  
"where?"  
  
"a pound about twenty feet from the vespa."  
  
"oh for the love of..."  
  
at that moment back at the prison...  
  
Haitani stood on stage,belting out strong the final line of his song, It's five-o-clock somewhere, by alan jackson and jimmy buffet.  
  
(author's note, normally i'd put the entire version of a song in here, but i am lazy today)  
  
"It's five a clock somewhere!"   
  
The crowd of prisoners boos, purposely trying to lower haitani score.  
  
"Hey!" he yells over the crowd, but they remain loud and moblike.  
  
Sarah turns to Shiri as they take cover behind a table.  
  
"so you know any good rock?  
  
A/N- well that was a fun little ficlet, i dunno when the next chapter will be but i'll try to get it up soon.  
  
Chibi Kitsune- as always, R&R or suffer the wrath of vanessa.  
  
Girl named vanessa- grr baby. 


	5. rock on boys

claimer of dis-  
  
Chibi desktop kitsune- Al no longer owns germany thanks to a short but devistating loss in battle, however he does not, will not, and probably never owned love hina.  
  
mutsumi- well let's see here, where do we stand?  
  
tama chan- myuh myuh myuh  
  
mutsumi- ok, kitsune and Al are lost on the highway, haitani and shiri and sarah are in a singing contest to protect themselves from becomeing play things, and i'm hanging around in the bar waiting for them to come back, was that all?  
  
Tama chan- myuh.  
  
Mutsumi- oh, and at home keitaro just got punched because of naru falling asleep and her head slideing into her lap?  
  
Tama chan- myuh.  
  
Mutsumi- ok, well no i'm sorry that keitaro hasn't dropped in here, try the shrine, sometimes he lands there.  
  
tama chan- (salutes) myuh!  
  
back with Shiri haitani and Sarah-  
  
"ok," sarah looked at shiri with a grim determination in her eyes, "one, two, three, shoot!"  
  
Shiri threw rock, and sarah threw...rock!  
  
"Gah, twelve times in a row, what are the odds of that?"  
  
Shiri shrugged nervously as the angry crowd of prisoners crowded around him and sarah.  
  
"youse two are cheating some hows." a large one growled.  
  
he picked up shiri and shook him roughly.  
  
"Hey, put him down!" sarah yelled as she kicked the big guy in the knee.  
  
"Ow!" the big guy glared at sarah and swiped at her, she dodged expertly and the big guy hit another one.  
  
the two angry large men, (one still holding shiri) moved twords sarah, very ticked looking.  
  
"Hey, why don't you two pick on someone your own size?"  
  
the two bullys turned to see haitani, in his first heroic act in this fic glared a freezeing cold look in their direction.  
  
"What did youse say?" the first one said as he loomed in front of haitani looking more dangerous then motoko's sister.  
  
"nothing." haitani squeeked in a tiny voice as he seemed to shrink before their very eyes.  
  
"WHAT DID YOU SAY?" demanded the second big one.  
  
"uh...he said that we'd be better entertainment if both of us went on next, rather then just one at a time." shiri stammered as he tryed to avoid being used as a club.  
  
"hmmmm." nigel, who had remained silent through the precedeings looked thoughtful.  
  
"alright, go on den."  
  
Haitani and shiri walked on stage, sarah watched from the crowd, a very hairy man had sat next to her and it looked as though he was there to make sure she didn't try to run.  
  
haitani looked nervously at shiri, "you got a plan there shorty?"  
  
Shiri grined nervously as he looked at his best friends equally nervous face. "Well I have a song, but my only plan so far is, hold them off as long as we can and if the worse comes to be, we try and protect sarah."  
  
"somehow I knew we'd end up doing something heroically stupid."  
  
"relax, that's just if we can't hold them off long enough for Al and Kitsune to get here."  
  
"yeah ok, how long could that take?"  
  
(meanwhile out on the highway)  
  
Al winces as another truck roars by.  
  
kitsune- It's ok Al, here comes some more, just show some more leg!  
  
Al- (in a dress pulling a leg of it up) WHY AM I DOING THIS!?!? I'M NOT EVEN A GIRL!!!  
  
Kitsune- well the dress dosen't fit me anymore, I bought that thing when I was depressed and had put on a few pounds.  
  
Al- well why arn't you showing leg? mine arn't that smooth!  
  
Kitsune- because you are a nice guy and will do whatever I say because I am a sexy girl,  
  
Al- (sighs) your right arn't you?   
  
a truck speeds by, splashing mud directaly on Al  
  
Al- (whimpers, and then begins laughing) WHY IS IT ALWAYS GUYS LIKE ME!?!? he yelled to the skys.  
  
Kitsune- it's funny to pick on the nice guy.  
  
(meanwhile, back at the prison)  
  
Haitani walks twords the mic and speaks confidently though he's scared beyond all reason.  
  
"Alright folks, well maybe none of you have heard but we were arrested while on our way to clean out our appartment, because it's just the latest in a line of places we've been kicked out of."  
  
Shiri speaks into his own mic, "And so, we'd like to sing a little number that tells the tale of how we got kicked out of our last house that we rented out."  
  
As shiri begins to play the stage keyboard and haitani begins to play the gitar, fond memorys begin to float back to them, and it's almost as if Keitaro and Al,   
  
(who had hung around their old home a lot)   
  
were playing with them.  
  
______________________________________________________  
  
Heave-ho, by smash mouth  
  
Haitani- neighbor called my landlord,said that she was pissed,up all night, makeing noise, and she can't get no rest!  
  
Shiri- She said we was running a flop house, full of thieves and thugs,   
  
(al and Keitaro would always wonder who these thieves and thugs were.)  
  
Musicians and hooligans, and we were all on drugs.  
  
Haitani- So she got bent, and raised the rent, said it would only take one more,  
  
phone call from my whiny neighbor!  
  
Haitani and shiri remember what happened when they read the notice...  
  
Haiatni- Whats up with our neighbor what's it gonna take to get a break? She's got us tip toeing around in fear!  
  
Shiri- Church mice at St. Leo's down the street have moved so far away, she has them packing running scared  
  
Haitani and shiri- How much more does she think we will paaaaay?  
  
Haitani- maybe someday when i'm old and fat and bored, I'll understand why our neighbor's make our life hell,  
  
Shiri- We can't even watch T.V, or sneeze or fart, Can't even breathe for fear our landlord will come and ring our bell.  
  
Haitani and shiri- How much more does she think we will Paaaay?  
  
Haitani- No more flop house, no more fun!  
  
Shiri- We got a whiny neighbor, we got a whiny neighbor,  
  
Haitani- shooting cans with BB guns,   
  
Shiri- We got a whiny neighbor, we got a whiny neighbor,  
  
Haitani-She says that these bums must go, I think we're gonna get the ole heave-ho  
  
Haitani and shiri think more, remembering the good times they had...  
  
Haitani- Neighbor called my land lord, it was a sunday after noon,  
  
Shiri- she couldn't hear the T.V set, we were haveing a BBQ  
  
Haitani- We were listenning to Louis Prima, and drinkng Meisterbrau, if she would have come, to talk it over, and wasen't a lazy cow.  
  
Shiri- But she got bent, and raised the rent, said it would only take one more, phone call from my whiny neighbor.  
  
Haitani- maybe someday when I'm jaded 9-5 at a job i hate, I'll come home and razz my neighbors too.  
  
Shiri- But i'd have a strategy and catch them when the rent is late, and all the other bills are over due.  
  
Haitani and Shiri- After all this is the neighborly waaaay.  
  
Haitani- No more music, no more fun!  
  
Shiri- We got a whiny neighbor, we got a whiny neighbor,  
  
Haitani- BBQ's in the sun,   
  
Shiri- We got a whiny neighbor, we got a whiny neighbor,  
  
Haitani-She says that these bums must go, I think we're gonna get the ole heave-ho  
  
Haitani- Don't even hide the porn,  
  
Shiri- Or put the bong away,  
  
Haitani and shiri- We didn't wanna live here anywaaaay.  
  
Haitani- neighbor called my landlord, said we didn't care, "the lawn is dead, dogs and cats, are stinking everywhere."  
  
Shiri- She said that we had crazy, parties every night,  
  
"The yard is littered with bottles and cans, skattered with boards and bikes."  
  
Haitani- She didn't get bent didn't raise the rent,   
  
we only got a note...  
  
(flash back to the day)  
  
Note- In 30 days you get the old heave-ho.  
  
Haitani-   
  
(screams in rage and begins loading up to attack the neighbor with hammers) WHAAAAAAAAA!  
  
Haitani- No more music, no more fun!  
  
Shiri- We got a whiny neighbor, we got a whiny neighbor,  
  
Haitani- BBQ's in the sun,   
  
Shiri- We got a whiny neighbor, we got a whiny neighbor,  
  
Haitani-She says that these punks must go, I think we're gonna get the ole heave-hoooooooooooooooe!  
  
The crowd throws a crazy applause, and then after a moment remembers that they want the boys to lose and they Boo half heartedly.  
  
The boys get off the stage and get to sarah who is glad to see the hairy man move.  
  
"you guys were awsome!" she cheers as the entire room watched the score hopefully.  
  
the numbers while by until the come to a stop, at 50.  
  
"What!?! this is an outrage! the things rigged!" sarah screams as she throws a cup at the machine.  
  
"well in that case little lady, you can be next." Nigel grins evilly as Sarah is picked up by the hairy man.  
  
"HEY! PUT ME DOWN!" sarah struggles but to no use.  
  
The boy's stand up,  
  
"hey put her down!"  
  
"yeah leave her out of this!"  
  
The prisoners quickly force The boys back into their seats forcefully as Sarah is taken backstage by a female prisoner to be dressed in a costume to perform.  
  
(on the side of the road)  
  
Al- Kitsune, are you sure you can't think of any better idea to get a ride? (still showing leg)  
  
Kitsune- well unless you want to throw yourself in front of one of these trucks, then no there isn't.  
  
As if an answer to their prayers, a screaming noise from the sky, and Keitaro plummets into the path of an oncomeing truck.  
  
BAM!  
  
This sends him back into the air to who knows where, but the truck stops and Al and Kitsune run over to get in, not haveing seen Keitaro.  
  
(back at the bar)  
  
Mutsumi- so your Al-chans window mascot?  
  
Chibi Kitsune- well one of them, but i'm the sexiest one on the computer.  
  
Chibi mascots Naru, Su, Mei, Sarah, and Sumomo poof into existance and glare at her.  
  
Chibi mascots N,M,S,S,S- We beg to differ!  
  
Chibi Kitsune- eep.  
  
A/N- well this hardly inspired peace of dribble is brought to you by, Lack of Sleep! but if you liked it let me know, same if you hated it, now if you excuse me i have a date with a pillow. 


	6. and when dawn comes?

claimer of dis-  
  
Chibi desktop kitsune- Al owns no part in love hina and wishes he had no part in the love hina christmas fanfic he didn't finish.  
  
Al- Hey! it's not my fault, my mom didn't pay for our internet to come back till after christmas.  
  
Chibi Kitsune- uh huh, (writers block)  
  
Al- Shut it!  
  
Haitani Shiri and sarah find themselves backed into a corner in the prisons cafiteria, the angry prisoners trapping them.  
  
"well me little birdies you tried but you just weren't good enough to win so now you get to suffer the agony of defeat, and around here it's a bit more painful then it normally would be." Nigal chuckled as he and the other prisoners edged closer to the trio.  
  
"N...no, don't!" Sarah whimpered tearfully, her worst fear comeing true.  
  
Haitani shot a look at shiri, who nodded, his face set in a look of determination, as he clenched and unclenched his fists.  
  
"Listen you, you guys leave the girl out of this, or else." Haitani glared, trying to size up the brutes in front and around him.  
  
"Now now my little birdies, what are you gonna do if we don't, most of us are bigger then you."  
  
"Sarah..." Shiri muttered out of the side of his mouth.  
  
"Huh?" she turned, trying to wipe away the tears in her eyes.  
  
"when you get over them, run, run for the door, and don't stop till you get to a guard."   
  
"what are you talking about?" She looked up at him, and sniffled slightly, she scared, sarah was never scared like this, and yet haitani and shiri didn't seem scared at all, why?  
  
"You ready?" Haitani asked as he and shiri glanced at each other?  
  
Shiri's answer was a curt nod.  
  
"NOW!"   
  
Shiri grabbed sarah and lifted her up, then ran to haitani who had put his hands together and bent down.  
  
Shiri put one foot in haitani's hands, and haitani launched shiri and sarah into the air.  
  
"HIIIIII-YA!" Shiri threw sarah as hard as he could, sending her over the heads of the criminals who lunged forward at haitani.  
  
"RUM SARAH, RUN!" Shiri disappered into the mob and sarah didn't see either of them as she landed on a table and rolled.  
  
She sprang to her feet and ran, the lunch room door was open! she darted through it, crying the whole way, they sacrificed themselves to protect her...  
  
"OMMPFF!" She ran into something firm and fell to the floor, she looked up and saw a sight that could never have looked better to her.  
  
"AL, KITSUNE!!!!" She wrapped her arms around the neko-boy she had run into and cried into his shirt.  
  
"Alyougottahelphaitaniandshiriarebeingkilledbytheprisoners!!!!"   
  
"What?" Al looked confused, and then traded a quick glance with kitsune, who nodded,  
  
"I have a plan."  
  
Haitani helped shiri to his feet, blood leaked from his friends nose, "mine too probably." Haitani mumbled.  
  
"Th...thanks man." The beating had stopped for a moment, they were cheering for the biggest guy in the prison, who had just decided to join the fray.  
  
"Well i never really thought this is how it would end, but i can't say it's a total shock." Haitani smirked through bleeding lips.  
  
"Yeah, by the way your shirts ripped." Shiri remarked, the two of them chuckled as haitani had made such a big deal about picking the right shirt for the evening, as he always had.  
  
"You two ready to bend over like good little bitches?" Nigal asked the two otaku.  
  
"You want us?" Haitani took a fighting pose, and smile coyly, like he actually thought they might win.  
  
"Come and get us." Shiri also posed, his fists clenched.  
  
The crowd surged forward, roaring...  
  
And then a noise overpowered the roar, silenceing all and makeing them stop, just before they reached the boys, it was a gitar!  
  
The prisoners turned, Alex stood on the stage with his gitar, he strumed it again, and a long silky leg extended from behind the curtin.  
  
Al- and now, the keeper of the keys, the countess of the klink, the mistress of murderers row, your new matron, Mama Konno!   
  
Kitsune steps out on stage and the music begins to play, as Alex slides off stage left.  
  
Kitsune- Ask any of the chickies in my pen, they'll tell you i'm the biggest mother...hen, i love them all and all of them love meeee, because the system works, the system called, resiprosity!  
  
(kitsune steps out onto the stage and the crowd cheers at the sexy fox girl, while al slips into the back and leads haitani and shiri out of the room behind all the criminals.)  
  
Kitsune- got a little motto, always sees me through, when your good to mama, mama's good to you.  
  
(kitsune dances suductively while Al and the boy's return with the tranqulizer guns from the police armory.)  
  
Al- are there no cops in this prison?  
  
(as kitsune dances the boys pick off prisoners one by one.)  
  
Kitsune- there's a lotta favors, i'm prepaired to do, you do one for mama, she'll do one for you.  
  
(kitsune hides the fact that danceing for perverted criminals freaks her out)  
  
Kitsune- they say that life is tit for tat, and that's the way i live, so i diserve a lotta tat   
  
(squeezes her chest while bending to give the guys a cleavage shot)  
  
for what i got to give!  
  
Don't you know that this hand, washes that one too, when your good to mama, mama's good to you!  
  
(the crowd goes wild and cheers, hopeing for some action.)  
  
If you want my gravy, pepper my ragu, spice it up for mama (slaps her butt) She'll get hot for you!  
  
(the prisoners howl, not noticeing their fellow prisoners dropping like flys.)  
  
(kitsune grabs a tamborene and plays it)  
  
When they pass that basket, contirbute too, you put in for mama, she'll put out for you!  
  
(the crowd throws money hopeing she'll put out.)  
  
The folks atop the ladder are the one's the world adores, so boost me up my ladder kid, and i'll boost you up yours!  
  
(strokes her hands down her sides)  
  
lets all stroke together, like the princeton crew, when your stroken mama mama's stroken you!  
  
So whats the one conclusion i can bring this number to? when your good, to mama, ma-ma's good...to youuuuuuuuu! (the music ends and nigal, the only one left cheers)  
  
Nigal- WOO HOO...huh? (looks around)  
  
Haitani and shiri smile, pointing the guns at him, and they fire, sending two darts directly into his left and right butt cheeks.  
  
"nighty nighty." Haitani smiled as Nigal hit the floor.  
  
Back at the bar...  
  
"oh my what a adventure, here Haitani-san, let get that." mutsumi reached over and wipes a bit of blood off of haitani's cheek.  
  
"Th...thanks." Haitani blushes bright red.  
  
"You can stare down criminal's and sacrifice yourself to save me, but you can't even handle mutsumi? some hero." Sarah grinned from her spot next to Al and what is left of his sushi plate.  
  
"well even if you can't handle girls, you still were heros tonight, so this last rounds on me." Kitsune lifted her mug.  
  
"To haitani and shiri!" Al cheered raiseing his own glass  
  
"To my new neighbors!" mutsumi cheered raiseing her mug.  
  
"To our friendship!" Cheered sarah.  
  
"To all of us!" Haitani and shiri cheered and everyone clanked their glasses together.  
  
A/N- Now see, it is still possible for me to finish a story.  
  
Chibi kitsune- good job, i didn't think you had it in you.  
  
Al- well so ends more fun, expect more in this bar after i finish some loose ends in my other storys  
  
CK- R&R as always, good night fanfiction.net! 


End file.
